By Anna-Lyse Fazio
Content warning: this blog covers topics such as intimate partner violence and sexual assault in the context of the book It Ends With Us and its recently released film adaptation. If you or someone you know needs support, please reach out to helplines such as 1800RESPECT (1800 737 732) or Lifeline (13 11 14).
From book to film, Colleen Hoover’s best-selling story It Ends With Us has been intentionally misrepresented in much of its marketing as a romance, shocking both readers and viewers with the ‘plot twist’ of intimate partner violence and sexual assault. The recent film premiere resulted in further controversy amid rumours of a feud between director and lead actor Justin Baldoni and producer and lead actress Blake Lively, whose contrasting press tours have left many wondering if they’re even promoting the same film.
In promoting the film, Baldoni doesn’t shy away from discussing intimate partner violence; he highlights it, aiming to use the film to bring awareness and inspire change. On the other hand, Lively’s widely critiqued, tone-deaf approach can be summarised in a single viral quote: ‘Grab your friends, wear your florals and head out to see it!’
So, why the controversy?
If you’re as chronically online as I am, chances are you already know how this supposed feud unfolded. But if you’ve somehow managed to dodge the drama, let me catch you up to speed. Baldoni optioned the film rights for It Ends With Us in 2019. In January 2023, Hoover announced Baldoni and Lively’s casting as the leads, Ryle Kincaid (neurosurgeon, abuser) and Lily Bloom (florist, survivor), respectively.
Fast forward to production: People magazine shares articles filed under ‘Romantic Movies’, focusing primarily on Lively’s outfits and foreshadowing the vapid direction of the film’s marketing and publicity. In post-production, tensions between Baldoni and Lively’s creative differences allegedly hit breaking point when Lively quietly commissioned her own cut of the film and screened it to fans. Lively and the cast then unfollowed Baldoni on social media as they began their separate press tours.
Baldoni’s solo press tour continued his focus on advocacy, spotlighting a partnership with the anti-violence organisation No More and encouraging viewers to reframe the narrative around domestic violence from ‘Why did she stay?’ to ‘Why does he harm?’ Lively, apparently uncomfortable with the topic of intimate partner violence, focused on promoting her various brands (including the launch of her new haircare line), method dressing in florals, talking about wearing Britney’s dress and offering evasive platitudes when faced with questions about domestic violence and survivors.
Shockingly, Lively also created a list of drinks for the post-premiere party using her brands, Betty Booze and Betty Buzz. These drinks were given punny names like ‘It Ends With Buzz’ and ‘Ryle You Wait’. Yes, you read that right: they named an alcoholic drink after the abusive male lead. Didn’t they know that approximately two-thirds of intimate partner violence victims in the US reported that their abuser had been drinking?
How was the book marketed?
While online backlash regarding the film’s promotion has primarily targeted Lively, the book has long been criticised for questionable marketing choices. The publisher’s website incorrectly categorises the book as a romance even though it doesn’t fit the key genre convention: a Happily Ever After or Happy For Now ending between the two romantic leads.
Spoiler alert: Lily and Ryle don’t end up together, and they were never meant to. The title of the book—It Ends With Us—refers to ending the cycle of abuse, and the story itself was inspired by Hoover’s mother’s experiences with domestic violence. Yet the book’s blurb and promotion would have you believe it’s an emotional romance with a love triangle, a sentiment encouraged by her fans who share disturbing ‘Team Ryle’ discourse on BookTok.
This misleading marketing feeds into a wildly irresponsible bait and switch, encouraging the audience to fall for Ryle as Lily does before flipping the script with gratuitous physical and sexual violence. Given the content and the unfortunately widespread prevalence of this kind of violence, trigger warnings would be a good idea, right? Hoover said, ‘I prefer my readers to go in blind.’ While the idea is to show people how easily one could fall for an abusive partner, the impact can be devastating for readers or viewers who may be unprepared to relive their own trauma through Lily’s story.
Readers and netizens have also been disappointed by the promotion of It Ends With Us merchandise and collaborations that undermine or ignore the experiences of domestic violence survivors. In January 2023, Hoover was forced to stop production of an It Ends With Us colouring book due to backlash from readers who couldn’t understand why something so inappropriate would have been greenlit in the first place.
Hoover later released a nail polish line in collaboration with Olive & June, which included colours such as ‘Brave Blush’ and ‘Lily Blooms’ and a set of press-on nails called ‘Blooming Lily’. None of the profits from this line have been shared with services supporting survivors—the website doesn’t even mention domestic violence at all. Instead, the description of ‘Brave Blush’ reads ‘A pretty pastel pink lily shade for nails that are ready for anything.’ Colleen Hoover’s comment? ‘I never want this pretty pink shade to end. And it’s good because it never chips!’
Where does this leave us?
With this context in mind, it shows that Hoover is aligning herself with Lively in marketing It Ends With Us as a fun summer rom-com rather than supporting Baldoni’s advocacy efforts. Content glossing over the violence dominates official It Ends With Us accounts, focusing on the florals and the smiles and Lively’s slow motion ‘twirling into the opening weekend’. Ads continued running on TikTok, full of smiling clips of the cast, totally devoid of any hint of the topic of domestic violence—because, let’s face it, rom-coms sell better! It’s no wonder people are showing up to screenings expecting a fun, Barbie-esque night, only to be blindsided and often triggered by the reality of Hoover’s story.
While It Ends With Us achieved the box office success they craved, taking Baldoni’s approach across the board could have validated survivors of domestic abuse and prepared viewers who could be triggered by the heavy themes. As Lively finally acknowledged in a single Instagram story (posted a whole week after the premiere), one in four women in the United States is affected by intimate partner violence. In Australia, it’s roughly the same—27% of Australian women reported having experienced at least one incident of violence by an intimate partner or ex-partner since the age of 15. It’s not a stretch to say that every single woman going to see the film likely knows, or is, a survivor of intimate partner violence or other forms of violence against women. By pushing empathy and care to the side in favour of florals and ‘fun’, one thing seems clear: ultimately, profit matters more than people.
Anna Fazio is completing a Diploma of Publishing & Communications (Advanced) part-time at the University of Melbourne while freelancing in digital marketing. When she’s not working or studying, you’ll either find her getting through her TBR, yapping about pop culture, or going out for live music.
Cover image by Юлія-Марія Повх on Pexels. Free to use under the Pexels License.
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